Christmas 2008 has also passed . At home no star was hanged - a frist in perhaps 30 years. No plum cake made- perhaps a first in 25 years... A christmas night booz and dance was there.. first time of its kind.

Jesus' birth is being celeberated on 25th December every year. Even the church differ in confirming the date as exact. Many who celeberate Christmas do not know what exactly the day is. For them it is a merry making day to beat the winter.

But besides the controversy of his date of birth, Jesus dwell in the minds of people who believe in him as God and who love him as one of most acclaimed men. To me he is an enigma. He answers many of my queries... but I am yet to get answers to a multiple of my other anxieties. I believe, he has fairly given me everything that I have... I also truly believe that he pulled me back from many of my falls. But for him, I confess, I would have managed myself worse. The carismatic group insists that we only believe in what is said glossy about him. According to them criticising Him is a big SIN. 'You should be GOD fearing', is what they profess. This thought may have derived from our age old partriarchial system where obedience is the doctrine. The family partriarch is always right, nobody has the authority to question what he does. For Generations we were made to follow this writ without opposition. Here I recall the famous matriarchial system followed by the 'Nair Tharavadu's' wherein only the children from the women folks had any stake in the property of the tharavadu. No offspring of a male member of the matriarchy was entitled for a share of the property. But alas ! here too, the head of the family was never never a woman. But the eldest male member of the family who ran the writ.

The family system has gone for a swirl and it is the nucleur family system which run the show in case of majority of households. There are exceptions depending on the economic, social and cultural characteristics of particular regions and social groups.

Coming back to Jesus, my unanswered questions are not circling me. I have fullest gratitude to him for keeping me safe in his hands.

But my question is for the ones who are deprived of a few grains to fill their stomach, for those who still do not posses a cloth to cover them from cold and heat, for those who do not have a roof over their head.... the list of woeful anxieties continue... I again ask him where is his justice system, towards the currupt criminals, who run the world, the country, the church, the temple. Why he is turning blind on the cheaters of the poor, exploiters of the vulnerables.... Answer Lord...

Notwithstanding my queries, I still wonder and am astonished to watch that those so called people who are abundantly blessed by him spare little time for praising him... whereas the one- time mealer make it a point that he attend the sunday mass, hold family prayer in the evening etc. etc. Is it because you have given them a straw by saying " those who starve (in the heart) are lucky for theirs is the heavenly kingdom".

I viewed a LaBL team addressing a gathering of villagers, wherein the LaBL bosses(two of them) , one of them even corss legged were promptly chaired while the villagers, elderly people, ladies and kids squat in the muddy filed attending. They should have shared their seats. What a social emancipation. The villagers can now have lantern for free but also dream of going to the city to be like one of them ? A village emancipation program... In bolywood (what is that ?) movies all villagers are good, beatiful, living in havelis and great family bondages.... so the city dwellers dream of making it to the cosy village one day.

Heaven is promised... where hell is true.